Recommit to Virtue: Part 10 of 10 - Virtuous Living Leads to Peaceful Living

Few of us possess this Gandhi-like commitment to change the world for the better, but all of us can personally polish off a rough edge or two.  Our greatest gift to the world is through the nurturing of the rising generation to the importance of virtue in their lives.  To avoid these eight societal mistakes, we must embrace a life of virtuous living.  We are so busy and carrying so many pressures in our daily lives that it is easy to lose sight of the importance of such a quest. 



Recommit to Virtue: The Struggle Within

There is a story told of a Native American warrior in the sunset of his days, who is passing on life truths to his grandson.  He begins, “A fight is going on inside of me.  It’s a terrible fight between two mighty wolves: one with beautiful flowing black fur and the other radiant white.”  He explains, “The shadowy one is Evil.  He is vanity, wrath, envy, lust, cowardice, greed, gluttony, sloth, and fear.  The glowing one is Good. He is humility, courage, cleanliness, obedience, industry, integrity, wisdom, gratitude and peace.  Son, you have this same fight raging inside of you.  So does everyone who has ever occupied this ground.”  The boy looked confused, and after a moment, asked, “Which wolf will win, Grandfather?”  There is a story told of a Native American warrior in the sunset of his days, who is passing on life truths to his grandson.  He begins, “A fight is going on inside of me.  It’s a terrible fight between two mighty wolves: one with beautiful flowing black fur and the other radiant white.”  He explains, “The shadowy one is Evil.  He is vanity, wrath, envy, lust, cowardice, greed, gluttony, sloth, and fear.  The glowing one is Good. He is humility, courage, cleanliness, obedience, industry, integrity, wisdom, gratitude and peace.  Son, you have this same fight raging inside of you.  So does everyone who has ever occupied this ground.”  The boy looked confused, and after a moment, asked, “Which wolf will win, Grandfather?”  The old warrior counseled, “The one you feed, son.  The one you feed!”

Personal Peace Part 4 of 4: How Do You Want to be Remembered?

Why is peace so rare, so fragile, so tenuous, and so easily disrupted?  How can we become more like the yogi who lie on beds of nails or walk on white-hot coals and receive no bodily harm, but are able to remain peaceful and tranquil throughout?   Peace is more than the opposite of war.  Gandhi’s admonition, “There is no way to peace; peace is the way,” aligns to that of Buddha: “Do not seek the peace without, peace comes from within.”   What then is this inner peace Gandhi and Buddha advocate?  How do we achieve it and sustain it?  What challenges calmness, serenity and tranquility?  What annoying, distressing, irritating, antagonizing, or disruptive events spoil our peace?  Irritants are everywhere and they beg us to react to them, to focus upon them, and to concentrate on their urgent cry.  Instead we must eliminate these distractions from our consciousness. 

Personal Peace Part 3 of 4: Stability in the Storm

True stability rests on issues more enduring than current matters.  Peace can be found in the storm, calmness can be felt during the fight, and security can be achieved in the heat of battle.  Fear, however, defeats peace because it rises out of feelings of isolation and scarcity; it destroys our perspective of security.  Anger also opposes peace as it manifests itself in a series of uncommunicated fears generated internally.  Hostility, wrath, and revenge are responses to this perceived fear.  When adrenaline does the thinking, our emotions will flow with the chemical tide.  Frenzied feelings of paranoia, anxiety, and trauma are easily imagined during such times.  This agitated feeling seems to be more the norm today rather than the exception.  Sometimes we become so extreme and fearful that we are offended or threatened over everything and anything.  We feel so insecure that we lash out in defense before even attempting to understand a situation.  All of this opposes personal feelings of peace.



Personal Peace Part 2 of 4: A Kind, Gentle, Peaceable Person

Recently I attended the funeral of my last living uncle on my father’s side.  He was a good man who never attained fame or glory.  He was my favorite uncle when I was young.  As I reflect upon my memories of him, a common thread is visible.  He was always happy and in a cheerful spirit.  When I visited last, he was worn down with the process of aging, but there was still his contagious smile always with a compliment to offer, always positive, always helping, and always cheerful.  As his funeral service was drawing to a close some final remarks were offered.  While the speaker’s thoughts developed, he began to describe Uncle Sterling.  His voice became clear, paced, and deliberate.  “Sterling,” he said, “was a kind, gentle, peaceable man, and we are all going to deeply miss his soothing influence.”  This comment permeated my soul and stayed with me the remainder of the day and well into the night.  In fact, here I am months later putting these thoughts down on paper.  What did the speaker mean by “a kind, gentle, peaceable man?”  The words sounded so nice and enviable to me.  What I would give if I were so fortunate to have someone utter these sentiments about me at the end of my days.  As I reflected upon the words individually, and then compared them to the man in question, I had to concur fully.  Of all the men I have had the fortune to be acquainted with, Sterling was indeed the kindest, gentlest, and most peaceable man I have known.



Personal Peace Part 1 of 4: Peace Cannot be Purchased

As evidenced through the media, our culture doesn’t really promote healthy feelings about ourselves.  I’ve determined that this world is a rough, demanding, and unsafe place, and consequently it is easy to feel insecure, discontented, and dissatisfied. Sadly, it’s all about the vanity of deficiencies: what I don’t have, what I lack, what I’m missing, who’s winning, and why I am not.   All of this competition leads to feeling anything but peaceful.

Families, Like Earthen-Filled Dams, are Vulnerable to the Waves of the World that Seek to Destroy Peace

The earthen-filled dam is a cost effective method of preserving spring runoff for use during the hot summer days. Without it there would be no crops in the deserts of the earth. Relatively inexpensive to build when compared to the over-engineered concrete structures that hold back massive river flows, these irrigation reservoirs dot the countryside of the farming communities of the world. Early spring rains sustain the young crops naturally, but just as the peak demand for moisture is reached the rain stops abruptly.  Within days the crop is lost to the dry hot sun if not irrigated.

Avoiding the Acquisition Race by Taking Charge of Life and Finding the Courage to Change our Level of Contentment

AS A SOCIETY WE HAVE BEEN DECEIVED!  Playing upon our vanities, the marketing folks have convinced us all that bigger, newer, faster, and safer is always better.  They have successfully sold us, amid our ever-growing egos, on the belief that satisfaction and contentment are directly tied to acquisition, impact, achievement, and control.  This just isn't true.  History shows that it never has been true and the current world condition indicates that it won't be true in the future either.  Discontent is the byproduct of this type of reasoning.  Thinking this way ensures that we never feel that we have enough: enough money, enough toys, enough possessions, enough security, enough attention, and enough significance.  As such, we all compete for limited resources in an attempt to feel safe and appreciated.  The reality is that there is sufficient for all.  The reality is that contentment and satisfaction are not found in things.  The reality is that contentment is a state of mind attained only through discipline and determination.  Happiness is not secured through ease, but through self-mastery.

Birth: From a Life of Peace and Predictability to a Life of Challenge and Change

There is a debate about when life begins.  I believe that at some point in the womb, the growing fetus becomes conscious of its surroundings: the warmth, the safety, the peace, the predictability.  At the moment of birth, however, the infant enters an environment that is hostile; it is cold, loud, intense, and bright.  The excruciating journey from the security of the mother’s womb is full of struggle and pain.  Arriving naked and confused, this new setting is harsh and demanding in comparison.  The pain of birth instantly creates dissonance between one’s current environment and past peace.  The arrival begins with the need for food and reassuring touch.  Pain leads to tears, and crying leads to relief.  To exist, strong instinctive survival behaviors take over to ensure safety and security.  Initial peace at this level is equated to the attainment of food and touch, as well as the avoidance of pain.  It is soon learned that tears and noise influence the surroundings.  Control of the hostile environment has begun. 

The Challenge of Life

Born self-centered and self-absorbed, we all react either consciously or unconsciously, to the need for survival and the desire for personal gratification.  From our first breathe of life, impulses surface as environmental situations are presented to us that challenge our very existence.  Resilience to such challenges is the key.  This primal level of survival concerns itself with self preservation and stimulation. Left completely unchecked, most of us will become self-serving, gluttonous, and lazy. 

Courage to Change

Never in the history of the world has there been a greater time for people to embrace a life of virtue. A life based upon time-proven values can be easily overshadowed by the clamor and turbulence of schedules and deadlines, of economic worries and stress, and of environmental and equality issues.  Virtue-based training must be re-established within our hearts so that we are able to positively influence the rising generation, the children of the Millennial Generation, a generation who will lead us to greater peace. Peace begins one individual, one family, one community, and one nation at a time. We must commit to change;  change that will enable us to see ourselves as we really are, to love ourselves as we really are, to cherish our fellow travelers for who they truly are, and to embrace the peaceful life we deserve. 

Meaning in Family Can Change a Life

Each of us, regardless of our current age, is a child.  We have mothers and fathers, individuals who parent us.  Some parents are biological while others are not.  As a young child, we learn much from these individuals who work to create a family for us.  Despite our physical growth, intellectual advancement, and emotional maturity, the title of child remains ours by the reality that our birth resulted in the formation of a family. 

Change a Life - Teach Resilience

As a father of a large family, I know the value of teaching children to be resilient.  Resilience is the ability to cope with stress and adversity.  Resilient individuals learn the process of ‘bouncing back’ after stressful situations or of ‘steeling oneself’ against difficult circumstances.  This process is most effectively learned through the intervention and support of family and community.